


(Can't Help) Faun'in in Love

by Miss_Psychotic



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Crack Treated Seriously, Faun!Kaner, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 19:01:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7519615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Psychotic/pseuds/Miss_Psychotic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Jonathan is 12, he meets a boy named Kaner.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(Can't Help) Faun'in in Love

**Author's Note:**

> So this started in the High-Vibing slack run by Svmadelyn.   
> It all came about because of Jonny's "Kaner is a GOAT" tweet, and lo and behold: Faun Kaner was born.
> 
> Many many many thanks to the wonderful Clayisforgirls for cheering me on and encouraging me to keep going when I just wanted to give up.
> 
> Also there are not enough words in any language to express my gratitude to JaxInk for their amazing Beta skills. I can confidently say that this fic is 200% better because of their hard work and input. Much love!

  
  


When Jonathan is 12, he meets a boy named Kaner.

 

It began when Jon stormed off in a huff, once again excluded and exiled from the makeshift hockey rink his small town had carefully created together in a vacant lot down the block.

 

The older kids refused to let him play. Jon was too young or too small — too  _ good _ , Jon thought bitterly, to play with them Never mind that  Jon’s father had been the first parent to help with construction of the  rink.

 

After storming away, Jon set off with one goal in mind. Find another place to play hockey.

 

There weren’t many ponds,rivers, or lakes around that the kids could practice on. The single river running through town still flowed too rapidly  for the water to settle and ice to solidify on top.

 

“There has to be somewhere else,” the brunette muttered.

 

Patrie-Kaines Forest  stood tall and foreboding on the edge of town. It had been a place where his father played as a child, but the Forest had overgrown and dangerous animals had moved in since then. All children of the area knew to stay clear.

 

But Jon’s father had spoken of a pond. A perfect pond, almost 50ft at the widest point, hiding in a thicket of trees. His father told Jon and his younger brother stories of growing up, playing pond hockey with his friends until the sun disappeared, and then trying to find their way home in the dark without tripping over logs and roots. Somehow they always made it home safely.

 

Jon’s belly ached with want. He wanted to play hockey. He wanted to practice. He wanted to show those bullies he was better than them.

 

Determined, Jon set off towards Patrie-Kaines Forest.

 

He wasn’t going to be long. He’d follow the path of the sun. Keep a straight line and walk until he found the pond — or he didn’t. 

 

If he found the pond, he’d just see if it was frozen enough to skate on. That’s all. He’d still be home before sunset.

 

Simple.

 

Jon walked cautiously through the trees. There was no path to follow and no way to find his way back other than hoping his internal compass (and the sun)  knew what straight meant.

 

Time seemed to slow  inside the Forest.

 

Jon felt as if he’d been walking for hours, but the sun seemed to remain static in the sky, peaking every so often between the tops of trees.

 

Jon was so busy staring at the sun, he failed to notice a change in the terrain, taking one step and then another, until his feet slid out from under him. He sprawled on his back a few feet onto a thin sheet of ice over. This was it!  A perfect hockey pond.

 

“Oh. Neat.” Jon smiled to himself, rolling onto his belly and crawling back to the edge and onto solid ground.

 

The lanky boy paced back and forth, deciding how to check if the ice was thick enough to skate on.

 

There was really only way: he’d have to walk it.

 

His parents always told Jon never to walk on ice he didn’t know the strength of, but it had been bitterly cold with no rain. The ice was smooth and seemed to have no underlying current. The water was still, and still waters freeze faster and thicker.

 

He would be safe.

 

***

 

Kaner watched the human boy with unrestrained curiosity. Years had passed since humans entered his family's ancestral home.

 

“What is it?” One of his sisters whispered.

 

“A human,” Kaner replied, bright blue eyes the colour of crystal water focused on the boy.

 

“What’s he doing?” Another sister asked.

 

“I don't know.” The older replied.

 

“He’s walking in the pond. It’s not frozen properly yet. He’s gonna fall!” Kaner’s youngest sister gasped. “Help him, Pat! He’s gonna fall!” 

 

Kaner glanced at his three sisters, Forest sprites, miniature humanoids no more than 6 inches tall with glittering wings as they continued to fly around his head and yell at him.

 

“But then I’ll fall, too!” Kaner reminded them.

 

“Then stop him before he falls.”

 

Kaner sighed deeply. He would get in trouble for this, but he was sworn to protect all humans in his home.

 

“Excuse me!” he called out, coming out from his hiding spot behind a tree.

 

“The ice is quite thin. You might want to come back,” he continued.

 

Jon turned at the sound of a voice and felt himself falling onto his backside in shock.

 

A boy, but not a boy, stood at the pond’s edge. Human down to his hips, skin pale and bare, his wide blue eyes stared intently. Unruly blonde curls decorated his head, where two small horns protruded from his crown.

 

His hips down were covered in thick downy fur, the same ginger blonde as his curls, and he had two legs, like a man's, but his limbs ended with two cloven hooves.

 

“Um,” Jon stated eloquently. 

 

“You need to come off the ice. It’s dangerous,” Kaner tried again.

 

“What are you?” Jon blurted, a cold wetness from the ice below starting to seep into his clothing.

 

“It’s kind of hard to explain. But I will — if you get off the ice. It’s going to break.” 

 

Jon frowned.

 

“No, it’s not,” he said matter-of-factly.

 

Kaner looked taken aback by the retort.

 

“Yes, it is. And you’ll fall and freeze and I’ll get in trouble for letting a human die in our home.” 

 

Jon turned his head slightly to the side in confusion. “You live here?”

 

“Yes! Now please, come off the ice!” Kaner told him again, voice firm.

 

“Okay.” Jon sighed, unconvinced but willing to move to calm the boy, animal, thing down.

 

Jon got to his feet and began walking towards the creature, determined to find out exactly what it was.

 

A sharp crack echoed through the air and he slipped beneath the ice so quickly, he didn’t register it until the icey cold pain of thousands of needles pricked his skin.

 

As he scrambled to grip the edge of the ice, two hands grabbed his own pulled him out.

 

Jon spluttered, shivering and frightened.

 

“I told you!” Kaner snapped.

 

“It wouldn’t have cracked if you hadn’t made me walk to you!” Jon managed to splutter out between chattering teeth.

 

“You need warmth. I can only take you to the edge of the Forest,” Kaner told him, helping Jon to stand and pulling him back towards the township.

 

“What are you?” Jon asked again, shivering violently as they walked.

 

“I’m the keeper of the Forest.” Kaner shrugged.

 

“Yeah but...  _ What _ are you?”

 

“I don’t know what you mean.” Kaner frowned.

 

“Do you have a name?”

 

“Patrick Kane. But my family calls me Kaner.”

 

“Patrie Kaines?” Jon asked, his voice accented heavily in French.

 

“No. Patrick Kane. Technically, the second. The Forest was named for my father almost 1,200 years ago.”

 

Jon shook his head in disbelief, his lips turning a ghastly shade of blue.

 

“Run home. Get warm. No humans can die in my Forest. Go.” Kaner shoved the boy out of the treeline and watched him depart.

 

He was going to be in a lot of trouble if the Sandman couldn’t steal away Jon’s memories of his time in the Forest while he slept.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


*******

 

“Jon, where are you going?” Andrée asked.

 

Jon paused on his way past the kitchen to the back door and faced his mother.

 

“Outside,” Jon replied, not  _ technically _ lying.

 

“Take your scarf. It’s cold today,” she said firmly.

 

“Yes, Maman!” Jon called, pulling his scarf from the hook by the back door before rushing out.

 

Jon had dreamed of the Patrie-Kaines Forest the night before... and of the blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy with weird hairy legs.

 

He dreamed of cold and ice and warm hands gripping him tightly. 

 

Jon had to know if it was real. His clothes from the day before were wet, and he’d been cold and drenched when he’d arrived back home.

 

His mother had yelled and demanded to know what happened. He didn’t have an answer for her — and he desperately wanted one.

 

***

 

“He’s back!” 

 

“What?” Kaner gawked and poked his head out from his burrow, glaring at the stupid human boy.

 

“Did Sandy take his memories?” The faun demanded.

 

“He said he couldn’t, that they had to stay for a reason. Something about the fates,” Jess, one of Kaner’s sisters, replied.

 

“You should go say hi. Make sure he doesn’t go on the ice again!” she suggested.

 

Kaner glared. “We’re not supposed to talk to humans! I’ll get in trouble.” 

 

“You’ll get in more trouble if he falls through the ice again.”

 

The boy in question stood on the bank closest to the hole in the ice, staring intently.

 

Jon had found the pond more easily the second time. He felt a pull in his belly leading the way, like he was connected to the small body of water.

 

The hole in the ice shocked him, but it confirmed that he had fallen through the day before.

 

“So how did I get out?” he muttered to himself, glancing around for a stick or branch he might have used.

 

“Um. That was me,” Kaner answered, standing awkwardly to the side, giving the human a small wave.

 

“You _ are  _ real.” Jon narrowed his eyes at the boy. “Whatever you are,” he added, eyes pointedly scanning over his legs.

 

Kaner felt his face flush all the way to his ears.

 

“If you haven’t figured it out yet, then that’s your fault,” Kaner replied, defensive.

 

Jon took a couple steps closer, circling the blonde and eyeing his hooves, small knobby tail and blunt horns.

 

“Goat,” he said eventually. He confirmed his thought with a decisive nod.

 

“ _ Excuse me _ ?” Kaner gasped indignantly, highly offended. He was a noble spirit of the Forest, strong, proud, and revered among his peers. 

 

He was not a goat. He was a  _ Faun _ . 

 

“Half goat, half human. I can’t remember the term. Centaur is horse and minotaur is bull,” Jon explained, brows furrowed as he pondered.

 

“Faun!” he finally blurted, looking proud of himself. As if it had been a test and he passed with flying colors.

 

Kaner eyed the boy warily.

 

“Why are you not running away and screaming?” he asked, head tilted in confusion.

 

“Well, you saved me yesterday.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“So you’re not going to hurt me. Why save me, only to hurt me later? That’s dumb.” Jon shrugged.

 

“Maybe you’re dumb. Coming back to the Forest,” Kaner shot back.

 

Jon glared. “I  _ had _ to know,” he replied, voice firm. “And my...” Jon paused, unsure of how much he should say.

 

“And what?” Kaner asked, moving to sit on a fallen tree.

 

Jon followed him over and sat next to the faun. Almost a foot of space between them.

 

“I had a feeling. In here.” Jon pressed his fingers into the centre of his chest between his lowest ribs. “It led me here. Like it was pulling me,” he tried to explain.

 

“It’s the Forest,” Kaner replied. “It hasn’t seen a human in ages. You need to ignore it.”

 

“Is this the part where you warn me never to return for fear of death?” Jon smirked, unafraid. Mostly.

 

“Because almost dying once wasn’t enough to get the message,” Kaner replied, snootily.

 

Jon’s expression turned hard.

 

“I can be here if I want. I’m not breaking the law.”

 

“Human law at least,” Kaner muttered.

 

Jon’s expression softened a bit.

 

“Am I going to get you into trouble?” he asked, almost apologetic.

 

“Not as much as I would if you got hurt. So I guess if you’re going to be here, I’m going to have to stay with you.” 

 

“I don’t need a babysitter!” Jon snapped. So much for softening.

 

Kaner pointedly looked at the Jon-sized hole in the ice.

 

The boy closed his mouth and huffed.

 

“Why were you on the ice to begin with?” Kaner asked.

 

“To see if I could skate on it. The older kids hog the rink my Dad helped make I can’t play hockey there anymore.”

 

“What’s hockey?” Kaner frowned.

 

Jon gawked, jaw open wide as he stared in disbelief.

 

“What is  _ hockey _ ?” he repeated. “Hockey is the greatest sport ever! One day I’m going to be the best at it.” 

 

“How do you play?”

 

Jon’s face split into a wide grin. 

 

“I’ll teach you,” he promised before gathering sticks and rocks to use as forwards and defence, drawing lines in the cold dirt to mark out a rink.

 

***

 

“Where have you been?” Andrée questioned her oldest son when he returned just before sunset, his cheeks pink from the cold and his shoes caked in mud.

 

Jon stuttered to find a plausible lie; he’d never really lied before — especially to his mother.

 

“Um.” 

 

“Jonathan.” 

 

“I was in the Forest,” he admitted, head bowed, expression resigned to his punishment.

 

“Patrie-Kaines?” she asked, surprised.

 

Jon nodded.

 

“Are you hurt?”

 

“No I... I have a friend I met there. I’m teaching them hockey!” Jon smiled.

 

Andrée paused to consider this. Jon didn’t have many friends, and there were worse places he could be playing. At least with two of them there, they’d be safer. The howling of wolves had long since passed as the years went on. The pack must have moved on.

 

“Just be home before dark. And don’t track mud through the house,” she chided.

 

Jon grinned wide in surprise.

 

“Yes, Maman!” he promised, kicking off his shoes to carry to the laundry room to clean.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


*******

  
  


“You’re getting good.” Jon beamed as he praised the faun, watching with clear admiration as his human hands effortlessly stickhandled the small rubber ball about the Forest floor.

 

“I’ve been practicing since you left them here,” Kaner replied, eyes on the yellow ball, continuing to quickly twist and turn his wrists and gracefully guide the ball around the obstacle course Jon had rigged up. 

 

“How long before the pond freezes completely?” The boy pondered out loud as he glanced over the frozen water.

 

The hole he’d fallen through almost two weeks earlier had been covered over, barely visible anymore.

 

“Not long now, maybe another week,” Kaner told him, handing over the hockey stick for Jon to practice, too. 

 

“Good. I miss skating,” Jon murmured.

 

“Is that the thing you do with the weird shoes to glide over the ice?” Kaner asked, he’d seen humans do that before whenever he looked out of the trees down into the town and along the river that ran through it.

 

“Yeah, the shoes are called skates. There are different types. For hockey, we use hockey skates,” Jon explained and went into great detail about edges and how they work to build momentum.

 

“Sounds like a lot of work,” Kaner told him, looking down at his hooves, wondering if he’d ever get to skate.

 

“You’re hooves have edges right?” Jon asked, reaching for one of Kaner’s legs.

 

Kaner snatched his hoof back quickly.

 

“Personal space!” he gasped, affronted.

 

Jon leveled an impatient glare at him.

 

“Let me look. Otherwise I’ll have to try and make some skates to fit you,” he explained.

 

“Oh,” Kaner said softly, moving to sit down on the hollow fallen tree next to the pond, hesitantly extending his leg towards the boy.

 

Jon’s hands were warm in his fur as they scrutinised his hoof, looking over the shape and tracing the inner edges.

 

“They could work,” Jon surmised out loud. “But there’s only one way to test it.” 

 

Kaner had a feeling he wasn’t going to like this.

 

***

 

“At least we know.” Jon was struggling not to laugh as Kaner slipped and slid across the ice with all the grace of a newborn giraffe. 

 

“This isn’t funny!” Kaner glared, crawling carefully off the frozen pond and onto thankfully solid earth.

 

“You’re right.” Jon nodded sagely before grinning again. 

 

Kaner continued to glare.

 

“So what do we do now?” he huffed, brushing dirt from his fur, trying to regain some dignity.

 

“I guess we try and make some skates for you.” Jon shrugged, an affectionate smile teasing at his lips.

 

Kaner looked down at his hooves and frowned at them.

 

“Will they fit?” he asked, worried.

 

“I’ll make them fit,” Jon promised, placing a hand on Kaner’s bare shoulder

 

Kaner smiled shyly at him, stomach fluttering with a new and foreign feeling. 

 

“Thank you.”

 

Jon smiled back, eyes fond as he thumbed back and forth over Kaner’s collar bone, transfixed by the softness of his skin and the warmth it radiated even though he was shirtless in the cold.

 

“You’re welcome.” Jon meant the words wholeheartedly. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


*******

 

“Jon, what are you doing, sweetie?” Andrée frowned, entering the garage and watching her son for a few moments.

 

He was hunched over the workbench, a pair of old skates at hand as well as the soft foam and stuffing from a few old pillows he’d asked permission to butcher.

 

“I’m trying to make these skates fit for Kaner.” 

 

Andrée sighed softly. 

 

Kaner was the name of her oldest son’s  _ Friend _ . Apparently, he was a Forest spirit and a goatman. (“ _ Faun _ , Maman.”) Andrée and Bryan had discussed this at length and had decided to let it go for now. Jon was practicing hockey and he seemed to be in better spirits since ‘meeting’ Kaner.

 

“Did the last modifications not work?” she asked him softly.

 

“No. Not enough cushioning. We’ll try again tomorrow,” Jon replied, carefully using the hot glue gun to secure a piece of thick foam in place.

 

“Alright, well, dinner will be ready soon. Wash up.”

 

“Yes, Maman.” 

 

***

 

“Jon! Why can’t I come, too?” David cried in outrage.

 

“Because. You’re too small!” Jon shot back, glaring at his brother.

 

“I want to play, too.” David pouted.

 

“No.” Jon persisted. “Maman! Tell Davey he can’t come!” 

 

“David. Let your brother go alone.” Andrée called back, in a tone that left no room for argument.

 

Jon smirked, slinging his backpack over his shoulders and rushing out the door.

 

***

 

“Well?” Jon hovered nervously, watching as Kaner fit his hooves into the skates and laced them up.

 

“They feel better.” Kaner smiled, standing up carefully.

 

Jon beamed, his skates already firmly laced to his own feet.

 

“Okay, let’s do this.” Jon stood on the ice and held out his hands, fingers entwined with Kaner’s as the Faun took tentative steps onto the ice.

 

“That’s it!” Jon beamed, slowly skating backwards and pulling Kaner along to get him used to moving over the ice.

 

“It feels weird,” Kaner told him, digging one toe into the ice, making them turn.

 

“You’ll get used to it. Like this, remember?” Jon moved to stand next to Kaner, demonstrating the basic motions of skating forward.

 

Kaner practiced, pushing off with one toe and gliding forward before repeating with the other leg.

 

“Hey! Look, Jon!” Kaner beamed. “I’m doing it!” His smile warming Jon all over.

 

“Good job!” Jon gave him a thumbs up. Heart pounding, stomach churning — but pride blossoming in his chest.

 

After letting Kaner get familiar with the skates and the motions of skating, Jon introduced a puck and stick.

 

“Now, stand on the ice and stickhandle,” Jon prompted, showing him a couple of basic moves.

 

Kaner had to focus not to topple over on the skates, not used to the balance required to remain upright. 

 

The first few attempts were pitiful, at best, but Jon knew Kaner would get better.

 

“Leave it with me. I’ll practice,” Kaner promised.

 

“I know.” Jon nodded, smiling fondly at his friend, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder.

 

“It’s getting dark, you should head home.” Kaner brushed away from the touch, almost reluctantly.

 

“It’s still early, I have time.” Jon shrugged.

 

“No, you need to go home,” Kaner said, more firmly.

 

Jon sighed and rolled his eyes.

 

“Whatever. See you tomorrow.” 

 

“I’ll be here,” Kaner deadpanned. “Like always.” 

 

***

 

“That’s it. Pick it up! Pick it up!” Jon encouraged as he deked around Kaner on the ice, puck gliding effortlessly due to his stickhandling.

 

Kaner poke checked the puck from Jon, stealing it before heading back down the pond and gaining speed.

 

“Kaner, slow down!” Jon shouted, watching in horror as the Faun struggled to decelerate, running out of ice to stop. The Faun flew off the ice, landing on the Forest floor with dirt, twigs, and leaves stuck in his hair and the fur of his legs.

 

“Ouch.” Kaner groaned, reaching to pull debris from his blonde curls.

 

“Probably should work on your stopping.” 

 

Kaner gave Jon a glare. “Wow. What a great idea. Why didn’t  _ I  _ think of that?” 

 

Jon bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing.

 

“Help me up, would you?” Kaner held out his hand.

 

Jon took it, helping the blonde up onto the ice again, holding him until he was sure the Faun wouldn’t fall.

 

“That was a pretty sweet move, though,” he praised. “It’s called a poke check.”

 

“Cool.” Kaner beamed, warmth of pride swelling in his chest. “Go again?” 

 

“You sure you’re not gonna hurt yourself again?” Jon shot back.

 

Kaner smirked, stealing the puck again and skating down the pond.

 

“Come get me!” he called at Jon’s affronted look.

 

***

 

“I have something for you.” Kaner tugged on Jon’s coat sleeve to get his attention.

 

“Oh?” Jon asked, grinning as the faun lead him over towards the base of a large tree.

 

“Wait here,” he instructed.

 

Jon nodded, busying himself with zipping up his coat and readjusting his backpack to sit more comfortably.

 

Kaner disappeared inside the large tree base for a few moments before returning with his hands behind his back.

 

“As you are the undisputed Hockey Champion of the Forest,” he paused to grin. “I thought you should have a crown,” Kaner explained, showing Jon the gift in his hands.

 

The crown was a circlet of vines, delicate and vivid green with white, purple and red flowers weaved through. Kaner reached forward and placed the crown on his head.

 

“Perfect fit.” He beamed, fussing with Jon’s hair so the crown sat properly.

 

Jon struggled to find words as Kaner placed the flower crown on his head, running his hands through Jon’s hair to ensure it sat straight.

 

“It’s great.” The boy finally said, giving Kaner the biggest smile he could manage. “I love it.” 

 

Kaner blushed bright red from the tips of his ears down to his collarbones.

 

“I’m glad.” He replied, biting his bottom lip.

 

“I have to get home.” The regret was evident in Jon’s voice.

 

“It’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Kaner promised, giving Jon a coy smile.

 

“Yeah.” Jon nodded, still grinning ear to ear as he exited the Forest.

  
  
  


*******

 

Jon paused as he made his way up the now familiar track towards the Patrie-Kaines Forest. 

 

His brother and a few of the older boys from the neighbourhood were waiting at the edge of the treeline.

 

“Davey, what are you doing here?” Jon hissed lowly, pulling his brother away from the group.

 

“Apparently, you’ve got yourself a sweet hockey pond and a  _ magical _ friend to play with.” One of the older boys, Trent, snickered while his friends laughed.

 

Jon gave David a betrayed look.

 

“Is it true? Does your  _ friend _ really have goat legs?” Trent’s younger brother asked, smirking.

 

“It’s probably just a goat he chases around with a puck.” 

 

The group laughed at Jon, pleased by the outrage clear on his face.

 

“He’s not a goat! He’s a Faun!” Jon snapped.

 

“Oh! A  _ Faun! _ ” Trent gasped. “Well, why didn’t you say so, Toews? And where is this Faun of yours?” 

 

“He’s not mine. He’s my friend,” Jon shot back, defensive.

 

“Well, if he’s your friend, then why can’t we meet him, too?” 

 

Jon clenched his jaw, back teeth grinding.

 

“C’mon, Jon, just show us,” David begged his older brother.

 

“Fine,” Jon snapped, swallowing thickly. “It’s this way.” 

 

He lead the group into the Forest, along the trail to the pond.

 

“Kaner?” Jon called out as he sat on the fallen tree to get his skates on.

 

“Kaner?” he called again. The Faun was always here by the time Jon arrived.

 

“So where is he, Toews?” 

 

“I don’t know, he’s usually here by now,” Jon replied, frustrated by Kaner’s tardiness.

 

“Or maybe he just doesn’t exist.” 

 

“He does, too!” Jon snapped.

 

“Maybe in your head. But Fauns aren’t real, idiot.”

 

“They are, too! I’ve seen him!”

 

“What a freak. You’re like what, 12 now? And you still have make-believe friends?” One of the other boys laughed. “Pathetic, Toews. C’mon, let’s go back to the rink.” 

 

“He’s not make-believe! Kaner is real!” Jon shouted, eyes watery with anger.

 

“Oh, great. Now he’s gonna cry.” Trent’s younger brother laughed and pointed.

 

“Cry baby! Cry Baby!” 

 

“Shut up!”

 

“Let’s go, leave the cry baby to his pretend friends.” Trent snickered.

 

Jon watched the older boys leave, unshed tears blurring his vision.

 

“Why’d you do that, Davey?” he asked his brother.

 

David didn’t reply, just turned his back and followed after the other boys.

 

Jon sat for a few minutes, wiping furiously at his eyes.

 

“Jon?” 

 

“Where have you been?” Jon demanded as soon as Kaner spoke.

 

“I... I can’t show myself to everyone, Jon! I’ll get in trouble! I wasn’t even supposed to show myself to you! But I couldn’t let you die.” 

 

“Instead you let them all think I’m a freak! That I made you up! That you’re not real?” Jon snapped, standing up and realizing that he hadn’t laced his skates. He didn’t feel like playing hockey anymore.

 

Jon took his feet from the skates and shoved them back into his boots, putting the skates back into his bag.

 

“I’m sorry, Jon. I just couldn’t,” Kaner tried to soothe.

 

“Yeah, well.” Jon floundered for a comeback, but he was too upset.

 

“We’re not friends anymore!” he decided. “So you don’t have to worry about getting in trouble.” 

 

“Jon!” Kaner gasped, reaching out to touch the boy.

 

“Don’t! We’re not friends! You’re not even real!” Jon yelled at him. “And if you are, you’re.... You’re a freak!” He slapped at Kaner’s hand and grabbed his bag, hastily making his way out of the Forest.

 

Jon felt heat building behind his eyes. He vowed to never go back in, furiously wiping at unbidden tears. It was far too dangerous.

  
  
  
  


*******

  
  


Kaner refused to talk to his family for days. Watching Jon walk away from him — from the Forest — was one of the most painful experiences of his long and, up until this point, boring life.

 

“He’s just mad. He’ll calm down and come back.” Kaner’s sisters promised him.

 

“He said we’re not friends anymore; he meant it. He’s gone,” Kaner replied, eyes damp as he sat forlornly on the fallen tree, halfheartedly poking the yellow rubber ball with his hockey stick that Jon had left behind.

 

“Humans change their minds quickly. It’ll be okay.” His sisters tried again to cheer him up.

 

Kaner shook his head and stood, walking to the edge of the pond and staring at the ice. 

 

“Jon’s gone. He’s not coming back. I just have to deal with that,” he told them, turning back to his burrow inside the hollowed base of a large tree. The Faun curled up inside, eyes cold as they stared longingly at the ice, heart aching for the human boy to come back and play.

 

Kaner stayed inside his burrow for a long time, watching the ice melt as spring and summer set in, then the leaves turning once more and the pond freezing over.

 

Still, Jon didn’t come back.

 

The seasons continued to change, Patrie-Kaines Forest began to decay. Trees no longer growing leaves, thorns replacing flowers, and darkness sinking into every hollow it could find.

 

The Forest was dying.

 

“Kaner, please. You must get up. Can’t you feel the Forest dying?” One of his sisters begged.

 

“Why does it need to grow?” Kaner replied, blinking slowly, so tired and so exhausted. “The Forest used to sustain life; humans would hunt for food and forage for berries. They do neither now. My Forest has no purpose. Let it die.” 

 

Kaner’s sisters shared worried looks, but left the Faun to his misery. Surely, there had to be someone who would be able to keep the Forest alive.

 

***

 

Jon kept his word about not returning to the Forest. His parents asked a few times why he never went back, tried pressuring him into answer their questions until Jon had snapped at them, hard words and angry pain at Kaner’s betrayal.

 

They never spoke of it again, of the Faun named Kaner with whom Jonny spent so long playing hockey and modifying skates. They never spoke of the Forest, of the vine and flower crown that still looked at perfect as the day it was made, or of the missing hockey stick.

 

It was replaced, like everything else. The older boys left for college and it freed up the rink for Jon to practise. He played in leagues, coached, and reffed younger kids. 

 

Jon buried himself in hockey and taekwondo and golf — anything else he could think of. He worked with trainers, visualising what he wanted: to be the best at hockey, to win the Stanley Cup, and bring it home to his family.

 

David had forgiven Jon for leaving him behind all those times he went into the Forest. Jon had forgiven his ambush with the older boys. While things weren’t perfect, when Jon came home from school, David was always excited to see him.

 

He dreamed of Kaner often. Bright blue eyes, unruly blonde curls, and a one-dimpled smile.

 

At 15, Jon was long past the embarrassment of waking up sticky after dreams of the blonde. Was long past the shame and guilt of what it meant.

 

Jon met many boys his own age through hockey, but none of them could match what he had with Kaner. None of them could instinctively find him on the ice, no-look passes, and one-dimpled grins of triumph.

 

His first fumblings with a partner happened with a girl from school who was pretty enough, but she didn’t make Jon’s stomach swoop and his heart race the way Kaner had. Jon suspected that his feelings for Kaner were more than friendship, but at 12 years old, he never really understood.

 

The girl from school didn’t laugh at him when he struggled to stay hard and enjoy himself. She told him that it’s called performance anxiety and that her class learnt about it in Health.

 

Jon was glad for the out because he didn’t want to tell her that he wasn’t attracted to her.

 

Every Christmas, Jon came home from Shattuck-St. Mary’s for two weeks to be with his family.

 

Patrie-Kaines Forest, visible through his kitchen window, would fill his stomach with lead each time he saw it.

 

The trees are always bare, stripped of leaves and growth, twisted into ugly garish figures of foreboding. A complete contrast to the flower crown still sitting on the top shelf of Jon’s desk, a fine layer of dust coating the luscious green vines and blooming flowers that should have long since died.

 

His Maman told him each year that the Forest doesn’t grow in spring or summer, that it stays dead and dying all year round. The local county talking about cutting it all down and making way for a new shopping centre.

 

Jon isn’t sure how he feels about it, but the thought of cutting down Kaner’s Forest makes him nauseated enough that he can’t eat dinner.

 

***

 

“Get up, Faun.” 

 

Kaner startled from his slumber, eyes almost frozen shut with snow.

 

“What do you want?” he snapped, glaring at the Fate.

 

“You haven’t moved for many seasons, Patrick Kane, Spirit of the Forest,” the Fate replied.

 

“So?”

 

“You have neglected your duties. Allowed your Forest to wither and die. Banished living creatures. And now, your judgment has been passed.”

 

“What?” Kaner sat up now, frowning as he noticed the two other Fates flanking the first.

 

“What judgement? What are you talking about?” 

 

“The Forest needs to live. It cannot thrive with you as her caretaker. Patrick Kane, you are being stripped of your title.”

 

“But... No! You can’t —”

 

“Judgment has already been passed. You will no longer care for the Forest, another will take your place.”

 

“But where will I go?” Kaner begged, eyes wet with tears, fear gripping his heart. His Forest, his beloved Forest. How could he have neglected her so.

 

“That is up to you to decide,” the Fate said solemnly.

 

The two Fates behind him held out a long silver string, pulling it taut to allow the first to slice it with a long nail.

 

Kaner felt something inside of him shift before everything fell dark.

 

The two other Fates collected each end of the string and wove them around a single red strand.

 

***

 

Jon sat upright in bed, his heart beating wildly in his chest as cool sweat rolled down the curve of his spine.

 

He shivered.

 

A heavy cold sunk into his belly, full and uncomfortable in a way he’d never felt before. 

 

Standing, Jon pulled on a hoodie and some slippers before padding quietly into the kitchen for some water, hoping it would soothe him.

 

Patrie-Kaines Forest was dark and imposing in the moonlight, its bare branches ghastly as they swayed slowly in the breeze.

 

The cold feeling in his belly intensified as he turned his back, doubling the teen over in pain.

 

Jon needed to go and visit the Forest, that much was obvious, but the teen didn’t know what was worse: continuing this slow, cold torture of his belly, or facing Kaner again after so many years.

 

Jon’s feet seemed to have made up his mind for him, kicking off the warm slippers and sliding into heavy boots.

 

He managed to snag a heavy winter coat as he headed out the door and trudged his way up the snowy path to the Forest’s edge.

 

The Forest was different than how he remembered it. No foliage, no flowers. Just bare branches and sharp thorns.

 

The path to the pond was gone, lost in the underbrush, but Jon knew the way. It took him a few moments to understand why his heart was beating so fast. He was afraid. There was no noise inside the Forest, no sounds of life, of creatures who lurked. Even the trees were silent as they moved. Silent as death.

 

Jon’s breath puffed out in visible huffs as he walked, condensation thickening the deeper into the Forest he walked. Fallen branches and brambles snared him, tripping the boy up in the darkness until, finally, he reached the pond.

 

The moon broke through the thickness of the trees, shining brightly down upon the fresh, smooth ice.

 

In the middle of the pond, a blond-haired boy lay naked and bare.

 

Jon rushed over, slipping and sliding across the ice before dropping to his knees and reaching for the boy.

 

Kaner’s face stared back at him. Once bright blue eyes, now dull and grey, unseeing as they stared ahead. His lips no longer red and full, but blue and thin.

 

His nubby horns were gone from the crown of his head and his legs were smooth and human, two feet and ten toes pink from the cold.

 

“Kaner?” Jon gasped softly, cradling the boy to his chest, one hand cupping his cheek and shaking his head. 

 

“Kaner, hey! Wake up.”

 

Kaner’s eyes remained unseeing.

 

Jon felt tears welling up, blinking furiously to clear the blur and look at his old friend properly.

 

“Kaner, you have to wake up.” Jon sniffled as tears fell upon his porcelain skin.

 

Almost instantly, Kaner’s eyes focused, the dull grey sharpening to a vivid blue as they landed on Jon’s face.

 

“Jon?” he rasped. “You came back?” 

 

“I did. What happened to you?” 

 

“They took my Forest, Jon. They stripped her from me.” Kaner’s whole body shivered, suddenly feeling the cold. His teeth began to chatter.

 

“What’s ha- ha- hap-pp-ening?” he stuttered out, frightened.

 

“You’re cold, Kaner. So cold. We have to get you warm.” 

 

“I can’t leave her,” Kaner begged, trying to remove himself from Jon’s hold. “I c-can’t...can’t le-leave my forest.” 

 

“You have to — or you’ll die,” Jon pleaded. “You can come back. I’ll bring you back. But you have to come with me now.” 

 

Patrick closed his mouth, arms wrapping around himself to try and preserve what little warmth he had.

 

He nodded slowly just once, allowing Jon to drape the thick winter coat over his shoulders and steer him towards the exit.

 

The Forest seemed to change around them. Roots, logs, branches, brambles — all disappearing from their path, expediting their exit.

 

For Kaner, it felt like banishment.

 

At the treeline, Kaner paused. Jon almost tripped over him.

 

“I’ve never crossed the threshold before.” Kaner, no longer chattering, told him.

 

“You can come back,” Jon promised.

 

“Can I?” Kaner asked, eyes impossibly wide.

 

Jon swallowed thickly before nodding, his expression firm. “Yes. I’ll bring you back.”

 

Kaner took a moment to look around his once beloved Forest, letting out a slow exhale of air before nodding and continuing on, out of his home and into the human world.

 

***

 

“Jonathan! Where have you been? Who is this?” 

 

“Maman, this is Kaner,” Jon said simply, avoiding her gaze as he pulled the blonde boy towards the closest bathroom and began to run the shower.

 

Kaner let him manhandle his body under the hot spray, sighing as his body defrosted. His fingers and toes tingled painfully at the temperature change but he didn’t complain.

 

When his skin turned a healthy pink again, Jon bundled Kaner into some of his warmest pyjamas and put him to bed. Exhausted by the transformation and the cold, Kaner slept deeply.

  
  


***

 

“You told us he was a Faun.” 

 

“He was a Faun. But now he’s not. I don’t know why. He said they took his Forest away from him.” 

 

Kaner listened as Jon and his mother whispered over the kitchen table, a pot of tea between them.

 

David and Jon’s father were out, buying things for Kaner and other provisions they needed.

 

“Jonathan...” Andrée started, reaching her hand out to take his.

 

“I don’t know why you insist on this tale, but let’s leave it in the past. Does Kaner have anywhere else to go? Family? Parents?” 

 

Jon shook his head. If she didn’t believe him about Kaner being a Faun, then she wouldn’t believe his home was the Forest or that his family members were 6 inches tall (well,his sisters at any rate).

 

“No, Maman. I’m... I’m all he knows.” And that was true now. Without his Forest to call home, all Kaner knew of the human world was Jonny, and hockey.

 

“Then we shall look after him until he is well enough to look after himself. Why don’t you go wake him for breakfast?” 

 

Kaner retreated back to the bed he had vacated, snuggled under mounds of warm blankets and waited for Jon to join him.

 

“Kaner?” 

 

“You never came back,” Kaner whispered, hiding his face under the layers of fabric.

 

“I was mad. And hurt,” Jon replied, reaching to pull the layers down, staring at Kaner’s face.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kaner said, eyes bright with unshed tears. “I was so lonely without you. I let my Forest die.” 

 

“Is that why they took her from you?” 

 

Kaner nodded.

 

“I’m sorry I abandoned you,” Jon said, reaching out to card a hand through Kaner’s curls. “I should have gone back.”

 

“I hurt you,” Kaner replied, nuzzling his face into Jon’s touch. “You had no reason to come back.” 

 

“I forgave you long ago,” Jon admitted, nudging Kaner over so he could snuggle down under the blankets, too.

 

“You did?” Kaner’s expression was vulnerable with hope, desperately wanting his Jon back.

 

“I did,” Jon confirmed, cupping Kaner’s cheek with one hand, thumb brushing his cheekbone tenderly.

 

“Then why didn’t you come back?” 

 

“Pride, I guess,” Jon answered. “And I was scared.” 

 

“Of what?” 

 

“Of this.” Jon leaned forward, brushing his lips against Kaner’s softly, pausing at the quiet gasp the blonde emitted before gathering courage and pressing forward again.

 

Kaner made a small pleasured sound into the kiss, going lax against Jon and letting him set the pace.

 

“Why is that something to be afraid of?” Kaner murmured breathlessly, when they broke for air.

 

“Because I couldn’t love a Forest spirit.” 

 

“But can you love me?” 

 

“I already do.” 

 


End file.
